Colonise the moon

My name is Madhavan Nayan and I work in VSSC. Iam the top gun
in my field, which is sending rockets to the moon. This is also a
place I call home because I stay back here for the night, many times
a week.

"You know what happens to the busy bee?...One day he will find
out that someone else is using his 'honey' ", my wife would tell me
thus when I tell her that I had lots of work at the office and would
not come back home for the night. But after successful attempts
such as the ASLV [ Arabian Sea Landing Vehicles], I wasn't going
to be stopped. I had a dream. I was reaching out to the moon.

"Now listen, you moongrel..eh..ah..I mean..mongrel!!. You cannot
make sure if your kids are going to school, but you think you can get
that contraption to the moon, of all places? You think a trip to the
moon will bring down the price of moong dal or rice?" Yes, that is
what my wife said..She said that..yes.

I wasn't going to be distracted. I had enough information from my
secret agent in NASA, Naomi Cambell [code name - ISRO 007] ,
that the americans were planning to colonise the moon. They were
establishing colonies everywhere. I had to establish territory in
the moon before americans ever got there. You see, America was a
place where a lot of Indians lived once before Christopher Colombus
brought his men over to displace the Indian community and establish
territory. I had a lot of cousins [ twice removed] in America. But Iam
ashamed to say that they are all working for Chris' nephews
and grandchildren, now. Naomi's message was loud and clear,
" 'Colonial cousins' fame skyrocket to moon". Jeeeezzz!!!!!!!!
They had taken off. I had no time to lose.

The final day of the launch had arrived.

"four...three..two..one..GO!!", I screamed at the top of my voice
and the rocket took off with a thundering blast. The blast and fire
of the rocket hit my head with a nerve shattering bang and I fell
unconcious on the floor . I still could hear the words 'moon...moon',
dripping out of my mouth

"Doctor, his name is Venugopal Unnikrishnan and Iam his wife. Ever since
he was suspended from service from VSSC, for being under the influence of
alcohol while on duty, he was not behaving normally. The night before Chandrayan was launched, he was so drunk and had not slept. At 6.45am, he announced to us that he was sending his own personal rocket to the moon, alongside Chandrayan and he set a rocket [ a kind of fire cracker you buy for Deepavali] aflame, sitting next to the TV, watching Chandrayan being launched, live. The only way to stop him was hit him on the head with a sledge hammer, which was all that was available. Is he trying to say moon..moon or is he simply moaning in pain, Doctor?"